The Origins Of The Thunder Legion Pecularities
by Lexion Kidd
Summary: Laxus gets his scar, Bickslow his tattoo, Evergreen finds an attraction in a certain 'man,' and Freed gets a permanent hair do... and Mystogan learns the importance of covering his face. And of not making dares with a drunk, pre-teen Thunder Legion and their 'God.' Category is Humor, not sure how humorous it is.


I own nothing but the overall idea and Mystogans persona. Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail and came up with Mystogan, but I took his name and put it to a whole new character. Please enjoy the story.

Honestly, underage drinking was a stupid idea. Which was why when asked why the hell they did what they had and they said that, the immediate phrase after that was "It was Bickslows idea."

In reality though, no one remembered who decided it was a good idea to drink (and since they were only 16-18, it probably _was_ Bickslow), not only the hard stuff behind the bar (that was probably actually Laxus' suggestion), but also the finer glasses from the Master's office (Evergreen or Freed were most likely to blame for that one). Thus the story where Laxus got his scar, Bickslow got his face tattoo, Mystogan started covering his face, Evergreens 'attraction' to Elfman started, and why Freed's hair is green starts. This story is in the time before the Thunder Legion, before Laxus was termed 'The Thunder God,' and at a time where Mystogan didn't really cover his face, and actually hung out with them quite a bit. As you can guess, they were quite drunk by the time they came to this point (none of them had much practice in the liquor department, so this was rather soon after they started), and they decided that this would be the perfect time to sneak upstairs to finish off what was left (which was much more than any of them would be able to drink in the time span they had to drink it in. None of them paid much attention to this fact). After managing to not get caught sneaking upstairs, or with the dozen or so bottles they were clutching, they plopped down at the farthest table from the balcony as was possible. Somewhere after the third bottle they'd opened since getting up to the second floor, Mystogan decided that a few dares were in order. Thinking this through, he decided he would also have to set up the conversation, and to play them into his plot. And so, he started the most stupid part of it all by saying,

"You know Laxus, you should have a cool stage name. What do you guys think?" And turning to the others, it soon snowballed into an epic adventure of stupidity that none of them or the rest of the guild ever forgot.

"Yeah! That'd be great, don't ya think boss?" This came from our resident seith mage, who had just discovered how much he loved his Mohawk. He was never getting rid of it.

"Of course, it would have to be something that demands respect. Our Laxus is too good for anything less than a god's name." This of course came from the ever adoring Freed, who at the time actually had shoulder length jet black hair pulled into a pony tail. Even as a teenager, he adored Laxus with everything that was his being. Well, except for the part that actually adored Mirajane, but a different story for a different time.

"So why not put 'God' in it? That would be an effective way to convey the message." Evergreen hadn't found her fan yet, or else she would probably have fanned it in front of her face at this moment. As it was, she was sprawled across the table, being the first one to fell the side effects of the amount of alcohol they had consumed.

"You mean something like The Thunder God, maybe? It pretty effectively describes his magic, and it has the main part in it." And the conversation was back to Mystogan. He wasn't giving Laxus a chance to speak out on this one, he'd shut them down if he did that.

"I like the sound of that." Apparently Mystogan was wrong. Laxus had slurred that out before mumbling something incoherent about symbols before downing the rest of whatever he was drinking.

"What was that Lax?" Mystogan was the only one that could call him that, and no one knew why. No one even knew why they hung out, the majority of the time they did ended in them wrecking whatever place they decided to have their latest squabble in. They still had no clear victor of their matches.

"I said I need some kind of a symbol or scar for people to remember me by. Something that strikes fear into them." Well, this was going better, and faster than Mystogan anticipated.

"Ooh! Ooh! Like an X over one eye or something! Some guy in a movie I saw once had an X over one eye, he looked pretty intima-inti-intame-intamate? How's that word go again Freed?"

Sighing, Freed finished one of the Masters bottles and said, "Intimidating, maybe? I can't quite understand you."

"Yeah! That big word Freed just used that I can't pronounce!" Bickslow was an idiot before he ever became an older and more mature idiot.

"Naw, Laxus needs something a bit more iconic. Like a lightning bolt or somethin'. Not something that's been seen in a _movie_ Bickslow! That means that _everyone_ has already seen it! It needs to be something a little more original!" Mystogan decided to take the conversation back to the original point: the embarrassment of them all.

"How's he gonna do that? An X is simple to get, you just cut a line, then another line across it. It's so simple even I can do it!"

Before Mystogan could say something about how a three year old could probably outdraw him, Laxus butte in.

"I ain't lettin' you nowhere near me with a knife. Myst over here is gonna do it." Again, the only one who got away with 'Myst' was Laxus. And also again, no one knew why.

"Wait, one of us is going to on purposely _carve_ a freaking _lightning bolt_ into Laxus? I am _not_ going to be around when that happens." Ever, always the voice of reason among the five, decided to make her standpoint clear and stood up to leave.

"Ooooiiiiii, wait, Ever! If I'm going through this, the rest of you are gonna do something as well."

"And that's supposed to make me want to stay?"

"It is if you want to see what happens to the rest of us." That was from Mystogan, who had decided that Laxus was on to him and was thus proceeding to try and make his life hell before he did the same to him.

"Just stay Ever. Come on, we're basically a team. That means we go through everything together. So sit down and listen to Laxus, or I can just draw a rune trap and make sure you don't leave til you do whatever he tells you to do. The choice is yours." Freed was quite the diplomat, don't you think?

Ever paused and thought over this, before dropping back into her seat groaning. "I am SO going to regret this, aren't I?"

"Probably." Laxus confirmed. He seemed completely sober, the way he was looking into their eyes. And so did Mystogan, which was really weird cause they had both put as much away as they all had…. unless of course somehow they had a tolerance for the stuff. They decided to just keep shut about it all.

"So this is how it's gonna go: Mystogan is going to give me a lightning bolt scar. He gets to pick where." Looking at Mystogan, who nodded his confirmation, Laxus wondered how bad of an idea this was. But he couldn't help himself; this was the most fun he'd had in years (sad but true statement). Turning to look at Bickslow next, Laxus smirked as he said, "Bicks, you're getting a tattoo across your face." Bickslow winced, pondered the thought for all of two seconds before nodding vigorously. After all, his mighty commander basically just gave him an order. No way he could ignore that, right? Next up was Freed. "Freed, you are going to have a choice between two. Either die you're hair in whatever color I choose, or kiss the She-Devil, a good ol' French smack, right in front of the whole Guild." Truth be told, the first part of that second option was a bit more enticing, but considering how far he'd have to go, and in front of _the whole guild?!_ Mirajane would surely kill him. He'd prefer to live, thank you.

"I'll trust you to pick a color that is suitable."

Laxus seemed a little disappointed, but shrugged and turned to Evergreen. He'd make sure at least _one_ of them would be embarrassed on the spot. He needed immediate action. And he knew just how to get it. "Ever, you're kissing Elfman."

Before Ever could respond, Mystogan stepped in. "Come on man, what are we, a bunch of pansy 5th grade girls? What's with all this making out? Ever, you're gonna get a face tattoo too. Matching ones with Bickslow."

"Awww, come on man, that's no fair! I wanted-"

"I'll kiss Elfman before I get matching tattoos of any sort with that freak. Knowing him, he's gonna go for some kind of a skull or something." Laxus shot an appreciative look at Mystogan, who smirked in response. That reminded him….

"Ok Ever, you got that then. Now what about Mystogan?" By this point, all the drinking was completely forgotten. Right up until then, anyways, as Mystogan reached under the table and brought another bottle out and slid it towards the other four. "If the four of you drink that in the next five minutes and I'll do whatever you want me to." And that's how they got just drunk enough then to decide to actually follow through with their own dares. And decide on this one.

"I've got it!" Bickslow exclaimed. "For the next twenty four hours, you have to touch any girl who talks to you right where there rack is. And make some kind of comment on them!"

Mystogan visibly paled, thinking of all the ways this could go wrong. Knowing there was no way out of it, he weakly nodded.

"Great! Now, Mystogan go get a knife. You have a scar to give him!"

Laxus jumped a little bit at that, he'd forgotten he himself had a dare. Swallowing as Mystogan pulled a knife out of his pocket and opened it up. Grinning a little on the creepy side, Mystogan said, "You might wanna hold him down guys. He's bound to yell, and most likely a lot."

And since the other three took that to heart, they went and pinned him down, not helping Laxus' panic subside in the least. Bickslow had the presence of mind to hit Laxus over the head with some old metal helmet he found in the corner, which succeeded in dazing him enough for Mystogan to start. He decided to go over the eye, for some unknown reason, and nearly cut Laxus eye out before he was done. With the first cut, Laxus let out a yell that could surely be heard all the way in Bosco, but for some reason couldn't move his head at all. Before he could let loose another one, Mystogan was done, and a crude lightning bolt scarred his face. Suddenly he was dropped, and the rest of the group scattered, with Bickslow and Evergreen jumping out the window while Mystogan and Freed opted to just go straight through the roof. Laxus blacked out after that, and he didn't remember anything until the next day.

When Laxus woke up, he heard a low murmur in the room, but he couldn't figure out who all was here. Opening his eyes, he figured out one thing. He couldn't open his right eye at all, and it hurt to try and move that side of his face at all. However, since his left eye was fully functioning, it flew open the minute he recognized one of the voices. _Mystogan!_ Sitting up with a bit of an effort, Laxus' head swam, but he focused on the other people in the room slowly. Bickslow, Evergreen, Freed, and Mystogan were standing there. Well, at least Evergreen, a man with a slightly dented helmet, another man with his face completely covered with a cap and a bandanna, and a guy that looked like Freed, but since when was Freed's hair pale green? Before he could ask any questions, the helmeted man reached up and took off his helmet while the other masked man took of his cap and bandanna, revealing themselves to be Bickslow with a ridiculous stick figure tattoo on his face and Mystogan, whose face seemed a little beaten up. Laxus just stared at them for a little bit before bursting out in laughter, which was quickly stopped by the pain that brought. Stifling his laughter, he looked over at Freed, before breaking out in more painful laughter. He looked like a walking Christmas decoration, what with his burgundy shirt and pale green hair! Gasping, he managed to choke out a, "How-how-how lons-how longs the hair-sposed-to be-to be-like that?"

Freed visibly blushed and scowled. "Mystogan picked some kind of a spell that won't let me turn it back until he or you decides to change it. So effectively, forever, most likely anyways."

"Oi, I'm the same way! Now I've got this freaky little stick figure on my face for the rest of my freakin life!" Bickslow was obviously extremely upset over that fact.

"And my reputation is ruined! I chose a place and time where we wouldn't get caught or spotted to k-k-ki-kis-"

"Kiss Elfman?" Laxus smirked. Evergreen blushed and nodded.

"But then Mystogan apparently got a picture of it and passed it out to everyone in the Guild! I'm ruined as a woman for having such low standards!"

"You sure seemed happy that he came to beat me up for doing that to you though! I swear, you like him don't you!"

"No, I don't! Don't say stuff like that!"

Laxus chuckled, and then suddenly remembered something. "Hey, what was the punishment for all of this?"

At this the four at the foot of his bed looked at each other. Then Mystogan spoke up. "Actually, none of us have been around the Guild… or town really, for the past couple of days. Master is pissed, so we're waiting until he cools down a little bit."

"What's he so pissed about?"

"You're scar, for the most part. He says we deserved what happened to us, so he's actually pretty pleased about our predicaments, but yours not so much."

"What's the matter? Surely Porlyusica could tell it was just an illusion, right?"

Again, the room went silent.

"Right guys?" Why weren't they answering? Unlesss…

"Mystogan….. you did just make it an illusion, right?"

"Well, you see…. kinda forgot to learn that spell we needed, and we weren't really thinking straight enough to remember, so….. yeah, you have a real scar now… yaaay…."

"…WHAT?!"

Let's just say that for the next few weeks, no wanted to be around Laxus or Mystogan. Or say anything about scars, lightning bolts, or any combination of the two. And that's how Laxus got his scar, Bickslow got his tattoo (Which he now adores), Evergreen became attached to Elfman and Freed now looks like an ornament ready to be hung up on Christmas Day. And Mystogan never really could show his face around Magnolia again. You see, he kind of has a warrant out for him for sexual harassment…. and he is the only one who still truly regrets accepting his dare.

And there we go. I feel like it kinda probably fell flat about half way through on til the end, but still. Maybe someone will get a few good laughs in about it.

Rilan Kidd-Rashe


End file.
